I guess this is my Blurred Lines? Someone asked me to write a “sexy” Christmas song and this is it. I think it’s clever, but only in the context of the I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus expanded universe.
lyrics
Hey / What’s your name
Do you need help / With your cookies
I couldn’t help but notice your dress
And wonder if you come here often
I’d like to talk about your stockings
Mistletoe and taking off rings
It gets cold up north and you can use a friend
Let me guide your sleigh tonight
I’ve never been one for accepting gifts
But would you grant my Christmas wish
Would you like / A candy cane
I can whip up / Some strong egg nog
You’re staying home while he’s out
No elves in the workshop
You’ll be alone so here’s a thought
Let’s misbehave and not get caught
It gets cold up north and you can use a friend
Let me guide your sleigh tonight
I’ve never been one for accepting gifts
So won’t you grant my Christmas wish
You don’t have / To answer now
I left my number / In a Christmas card
You know how good you look in red
And I’ve tried to get you outta my head
You’re looking at me like a misfit toy
Do you wanna know if I’ve been a good boy?
It gets cold up north and you can use a friend
Let me guide your sleigh tonight
I’ve never been one for accepting gifts
But would you grant my Christmas wish
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